In a series of six posts, I explain how we can overcome our addiction to social media by using teachings from early Buddhist scriptures. These teachings come from the Vitakkasanthana Sutta, which outlines five strategies to conquer compelling thoughts and urges.
The key advice from the Buddha is to follow these tools in order. If redirecting the mind to positive thoughts doesn’t work, we should then consider the drawbacks of addiction. If that also doesn’t help, the next tool is to “ignore and forget” whatever we’re obsessed with. That’s the strategy we’ll focus on today.
The guidance in the discourse is brief: if bad, unskillful thoughts related to desire, hate, and delusion keep arising, we should ignore and forget about them. You might think this is easier said than done, but it’s practical advice aimed at reducing temptation.
We will address this in two areas: external activity and internal activity. First, let’s consider how to ignore social media by changing our habits. For instance, just as someone trying to lose weight would avoid having potato chips in the house, we can limit our exposure to social media by changing our phone settings.
For instance, move your social media apps to the second or third screen of your phone so accessing them takes more effort. Disable red notification badges and audible alerts to avoid constant interruptions. Consider keeping your phone out of sight and not at your bedside to reduce temptation first thing in the morning. Charge your phone in another room and use an alarm clock instead.
By charging your phone in a place that’s not immediately accessible, you gain an opportunity to start your day free from addiction. This simple habit can improve the rest of your day. Also, consider turning off your phone when charging it overnight to create a barrier that makes it easier to avoid addiction.
Charging my phone in another room often leads me to meditate or read a book first thing in the morning rather than scrolling through social media. Reading books, especially physical ones, helps train the mind and increase concentration.
Create other opportunities for phone-free time, such as during meals or social gatherings. Some people even create fun rules, like making everyone put their phones in a pile during meals, with the first person to pick up their phone paying for everyone’s meal.
Meditation retreats can also help you relearn happiness without being online. Some retreats even require participants to hand in their phones, but even if they don’t, you can leave your phone in your car or a sealed envelope to create an extra barrier against temptation.
This is all about managing our external environment to reduce social media addiction. Internally, there are also strategies to avoid getting caught up in thoughts about our addiction. One useful technique is to change how we use our eyes for attention.
Typically, we focus narrowly, like a flashlight, which misses a lot. Instead, try a softer gaze where you’re aware of the entire visual field, similar to a lamp that illuminates many things at once. This relaxed approach can calm the body and mind.
In meditation, a narrow focus can lead to getting lost in thoughts. But with a soft gaze, you can be aware of multiple sensations, which helps thoughts pass through the mind without getting caught up in them.
This relates back to ignoring and forgetting compelling thoughts. By maintaining a soft, open gaze, it becomes easier to let thoughts and urges pass without acting on them. This technique is known as “urge surfing,” where you observe urges as they rise and fall, rather than giving in to them immediately.
In summary, we’ve learned that by strategically managing our environment and shifting our focus, we can reduce our dependence on social media and other addictive behaviors. By creating addiction-free spaces and training our minds, we can let go of these compulsions and improve our well-being.