In a series of six posts, I explain how we can break free from social media addiction using teachings from early Buddhist scriptures, particularly the Vitakkasanthana Sutta. This Sutta provides five strategies to overcome persistent thoughts and urges.
One important thing to note is that the Buddha advised using these tools sequentially. If redirecting your mind to positive thoughts doesn’t work, next, you consider the drawbacks of addiction. If that still doesn’t help, then you move to simply “ignore and forget” what you’re obsessed with. That’s the focus for today.
The Sutta advises that if a practitioner’s mind keeps generating harmful or unskillful thoughts tied to desire, hate, or delusion, they should ignore and forget them. I know this sounds easier said than done!
Though it may seem simplistic, think of it like this: if someone with good eyesight comes across something undesirable, they just close their eyes or look away. This principle is about reducing temptation.
We’ll explore two areas: external activity and internal activity. First, we’ll look at how we can literally ignore and change our social media habits. Second, we’ll consider how our habitual use of attention affects our experience and well-being.
For instance, if you’re trying to lose weight and struggle with eating potato chips, keeping them out of sight can help you resist temptation. The same principle applies to social media. By making social media apps less accessible on your phone, like moving them to a second or third screen, you reduce the temptation to use them.
Turning off those little red notification badges and audible alerts can also help. These features are designed to grab your attention, so disabling them puts some control back in your hands.
It’s also useful to keep your phone out of sight sometimes. Don’t charge it by your bedside; try another room instead so it’s not the first thing you reach for in the morning. And if you need to know the time at night, consider using an alarm clock instead of your phone.
Turning off your phone while charging it overnight can also be beneficial. The few extra seconds it takes to boot up when you turn it back on can create a helpful barrier to immediate access. This reduces the impulse to indulge in online activities first thing in the morning.
When I charge my phone in the living room, I find I’m more likely to meditate or read a book rather than checking my news feed. Starting the day with a paper book can be much healthier than diving into the internet right away.
During meals, try putting your phone on mute or keeping it out of reach to create phone-free time. Some people even place their phones in a stack at the table, and the first to touch their phone has to pay for everyone’s meal.
Meditation retreats offer another way to disconnect from online addiction. Some retreats require you to hand in your phone, but if not, you could leave it in your car or turned off at the bottom of your suitcase. You could even put it in a sealed envelope with a motivational message like “simplicity and presence.”
Now let’s discuss internally avoiding the compulsion to check our phones. There are two ways we can pay attention with our eyes. The first is focusing narrowly, like a flashlight, which is our usual way of seeing things. The second is a soft focus, like a lamp that illuminates a whole area without focusing on any single detail. This open, relaxed way of seeing can help our body and mind relax, making it easier to let go of distracting thoughts.
When we apply this open focus during meditation, we can be aware of many bodily sensations and thoughts without getting caught up in them. Thoughts become just one part of a broader awareness, making it easier to let them pass without acting on them.
This concept is similar to “urge surfing,” where you observe the urge rise and fall without giving in. By maintaining this open focus and watching the urge without acting on it, you can let it pass and continue with your activities.
So, while ignoring and forgetting compelling thoughts may seem simple, it’s actually a profound practice. By changing how we interact with the external world and how we relate internally to our thoughts and urges, we can gradually free ourselves from addictive patterns.
In summary:
1. Manage your phone and app accessibility.
2. Create phone-free times during your day.
3. Practice an open, relaxed focus to deal with urges and distracting thoughts.
Through these strategies, we can create addiction-free zones and learn to let thoughts and urges pass naturally.