There can be many reasons why we avoid meditating. We might not want to deal with certain feelings, or maybe we feel that we’ve failed at it before. Sometimes, we think that taking time for ourselves is selfish, or that meditating will keep us from getting things done. We might even be scared of change.
So, we make excuses. Even though we know meditation is good for us—we’ve read about it and experienced its benefits ourselves—we still avoid it. We get busy and can’t seem to find the time to sit down and meditate.
I used to believe that if I understood my resistance to meditation, it would help. But that didn’t really solve anything. Eventually, I realized that instead of analyzing my resistance, it was more effective to acknowledge and accept it. This is a key part of mindful self-compassion.
When you feel resistance to meditation, try to become aware of the feelings that come with it. Where do you feel them in your body? What do they feel like? What thoughts do they bring up? Just observe these things and be present with your resistance. Treat it as an object of mindfulness. Understand that resistance is a form of conflict and fear, which are types of pain. Notice this pain and treat it kindly. Reassure yourself with kind words like, “It’s OK. You’re going to be OK. I’ll take good care of you.”
Here’s the interesting part: by becoming mindful of your resistance, you’re already meditating. Your resistance becomes an opportunity to practice mindfulness. So, wherever you are, close your eyes. Breathe in and experience the resistance. Breathe out and feel it. This is mindful breathing meditation.
Continue to talk to the fearful part of yourself, saying things like, “Hi there. I accept you as part of my experience. I care about you and I want you to be at ease. You can stay as long as you like, and you’re welcome to meditate with me.” Do this until you feel more comfortable in your practice.
The specific reasons for your resistance aren’t important because you’re not debating with them logically. And that’s okay, because resistance is clever. It knows how to make you feel doubtful and incapable. It’s skilled at this. What it doesn’t understand is how to handle being acknowledged and accepted.
Instead of fighting your resistance, outsmart it by surrounding it with mindfulness and kindness.
If your resistance continues day after day, set a low bar for what constitutes a meditation session. Five minutes is perfectly fine. The key is consistency, not duration. If you meditate for just five minutes a day, you’ll be meditating regularly and overcoming your resistance.
Remember, the only bad meditation is the one you don’t do. All other sessions are beneficial. So don’t stress about the quality; just keep practicing.