In his book “The Road Less Traveled,” the late psychiatrist M. Scott Peck starts by saying that life is difficult. He highlights that once we truly understand and accept this fact, we can transcend it. Peck believes that after acceptance, life’s difficulties become less daunting because the struggle of acceptance is gone.
While Peck views this absolutely, I’d say that understanding and accepting life’s challenges can make them easier to handle. Being human is tough, but once we recognize that suffering is a part of life, things become more manageable.
I have some suggestions that might help you grasp this truth. Read through the following points slowly and thoughtfully, giving yourself time to absorb each one. Test them against your own experiences and see how they resonate with you.
First, drop any defensiveness and the need to appear perfect. Embrace your vulnerability and let go of the urge to see yourself as always succeeding. Accept your human imperfections.
Spend at least a minute on each of these thoughts, perhaps a bit longer on the final one.
The initial activities are designed to help you empathize with yourself. They remind you that you deserve support and kindness. Phrases like “May I be well. May I be at ease. May I be kind to myself and others” are powerful tools for self-support. By the time you reach the fifth suggestion, you might find yourself genuinely wanting to offer kindness and encouragement to yourself.
These reflections can be uncomfortable as they expose your vulnerabilities. You might feel heartache or sadness, which is a natural response. These feelings are signs that you are connecting with the suppressed yearnings and pains in your life. Often, we convince ourselves that we are happier than we truly are and view suffering as a temporary setback we’re almost through. Facing the reality of frequent suffering and lack of control over life can be daunting.
When painful emotions arise, it’s important to accept them and treat them with kindness. This is a positive indication that you’re facing the reality of life’s difficulties. Self-empathy and kindness help in overcoming the denial that stems from fear.
These reflections shift us from fear and denial towards love and acceptance. Embracing our vulnerability helps us acknowledge life’s challenges, while also fostering self-empathy and support as we navigate the complexities of being human.