Generally, we humans struggle with doing things that are good for our long-term well-being, especially when they’re challenging in the short term. Regular habits like meditating or exercising require self-discipline. It can feel stressful trying to fit these practices into our already busy lives, especially when we’re restless or uncomfortable. While these activities benefit us greatly in the long run, it’s hard to focus on that when the short-term discomfort is so present.
Often, we try to push through these difficulties by sheer willpower. But this approach can lead to burnout. For instance, we might stick to a diet only to binge later, or train intensely and then completely slack off. I’ve discovered a simpler, more compassionate method to overcome short-term resistance and commit to long-term well-being. This method hinges on the idea that self-discipline can actually stem from self-compassion, making it easier to stick with beneficial habits.
Here’s the trick: treat your future self with the same compassion you would offer a friend. This means considering how your actions now will affect your future self and making choices that will benefit them in the long term.
For example, letting yourself off the hook when things get tough is short-term thinking. Self-compassion, however, involves asking how this decision will make you feel later. By developing a compassionate relationship with your future self, self-discipline becomes less about punishment and more about self-care.
This approach reduces the likelihood of a backlash because you aren’t forcing yourself to do anything. Instead, you persuade yourself in a rational and kind manner. Imagining the positive feelings your future self will have because of your current actions can bring joy into the present moment. Additionally, feeling grateful in the future for what your past self did can be a source of happiness. Overall, this is much more pleasant than simply powering through hardships. Viewing your actions as supportive rather than punitive helps you feel better about yourself, seeing yourself as a friend rather than as an obstacle to happiness.
In short, empathy for your future self makes it much easier to avoid impulsive behaviors and adopt habits that promote long-term well-being.