In a series of six posts, I explain using teachings from early Buddhist scriptures how we can break free from our addiction to social media. These teachings come from the Vitakkasanthana Sutta, which outlines five strategies for overcoming persistent thoughts and urges.
Instead of calling it “Vitakkasanthana Sutta,” I’ll refer to it as “the Social Media Sutra” because it’s more relatable and reminds us that these teachings can be applied to our modern lives.
When I say we’re “addicted” to social media, I mean we use it compulsively despite knowing it harms us and others. This is addiction: repeatedly doing something harmful but feeling out of control and struggling to stop.
Addictions often bring secondary effects: feelings of shame, secrecy, anxiety when cutting back, and even anger. For many, this anger and outrage can be the most troubling aspect of social media addiction.
The Social Media Sutra offers five tools to overcome compelling urges. The first tool is described as focusing on something that brings bad, unskillful thoughts like desire, hate, and delusion, and then shifting focus to something skillful. This technique helps those negative thoughts diminish and eventually end.
The Buddha offers an analogy: it’s like a carpenter who uses a small peg to knock out a larger one. This doesn’t necessarily refer to meditation but can be applied in any area of life, including our online activities. Social media itself isn’t inherently bad, but our addiction to it can be harmful. This includes activities like reading news articles or playing games.
The principle here is to switch from an unhelpful urge to a helpful way of behaving, based on mindfulness. Mindfulness allows us to step back and observe our actions, recognizing some choices make us happier while others do not.
When we become mindful, it might be uncomfortable, and we may see things like addiction or anger causing misery. It’s important to stop blaming ourselves for our addictions. Blame adds more unskillfulness. Addiction isn’t a personal failing but a result of various causes and conditions. By recognizing this, we can choose not to blame ourselves.
To apply this teaching of redirecting to the skillful, start by being mindful and recognizing that you’re doing something that makes you unhappy. Identify the unhelpful mental habit you need to change. The Buddha’s analogy is apt: using a small peg to knock out a larger one reminds us that even though our mindfulness might seem weak, it can still be effective if directed well. Like a carpenter using repeated blows to remove a peg, we need to persistently work on changing our habits.
Common forms of addiction include craving stimulation, craving attention, and becoming angry. Let’s handle these one at a time.
Craving continual input can make us anxious without constant information. If you experience this, take a mindful break. Notice physical sensations and the reality of your surroundings, offering a more wholesome and grounding type of stimulation. This mindful awareness can leave us more fulfilled, switching from mindless stimulation to mindful appreciation.
Craving attention from social media interactions can be a sign that you don’t feel good about yourself. This lack of self-value leads to dependence on others’ reassurance. To counter this, give yourself love and compassion. Put your hand on your heart and remind yourself, “It’s OK. You matter, and I care about you.”
Outrage addiction, or dependency on the feelings from being self-righteously angry, is another common issue. Recognize that anger means you’re suffering. Offer yourself kindness and remember the person you’re angry with is also a feeling being. Connecting empathetically can lead to more compassionate communication.
You can trust the power of connection, empathy, and kindness. Trust in the practice of Dharma means trusting your ability to let go of painful habits and find true contentment in the present moment.
So, the first tool for dealing with unhelpful behaviors related to social media is shifting our attention to something skillful. Trust in the present moment, trust that you matter, and trust in empathetic connection.
In summary, when you crave stimulation, trust the present moment. When you crave attention, trust that you are enough. When angry, trust in empathetic connection. In this way, we can shift from unhealthy to healthier relationships with social media. Trust the Dharma—it works.