Embrace Your Pain: Insights from The Social Media Sutra, Chapter 4

CalmMinds MeditationProduct Review

Embrace Your Pain: Insights from The Social Media Sutra, Chapter 4

0 Comments

Embrace Your Pain: Insights from The Social Media Sutra, Chapter 4

In a series of six posts, I’m explaining how we can free ourselves from our addiction to social media using teachings from the early Buddhist scriptures, specifically from the Vitakkasanthana Sutta. This Sutta, which I like to call the “Social Media Sutra,” outlines five strategies to overcome compelling urges.

“Vitakkasanthana Sutta” translates to “The Discourse on Quieting Thinking,” where “thinking” refers not just to our inner dialog but also to the emotional urges accompanying it. In this context, the urge to compulsively use social media is a form of thinking.

The first method involves turning our attention to positive aspects of our experience. The second looks at the negative consequences of our unskillful habits. The third targets reducing temptations. Now, let’s delve into the fourth method and how it can help with social media addiction.

The fourth tool in the Sutta is “stopping the formation of thoughts.” Essentially, if the other methods haven’t quelled our unhelpful thoughts and urges, the goal is to stop those thoughts from forming altogether. This involves noticing when unskillful thoughts related to desire, hate, and delusion arise, and then intentionally stopping them. By doing so, our mind becomes calm, unified, and deeply mindful.

An analogy from the Sutta describes this process: Imagine a person walking quickly decides to slow down, then stop, then sit, and finally lie down, progressively adopting more restful and stable positions. Similarly, we can become aware of what’s propelling our mental bombination and gradually let go to find rest.

When our mind generates thoughts and urges for compulsive online activity, various mechanisms drive this. By identifying and understanding these drivers, we can let our minds settle. For instance, if we notice anxiety while aimlessly surfing the web, this might manifest as a tight, uncomfortable sensation in the gut. Our brain interprets boredom or missing out as threats, creating this unpleasant feeling to alert us. In response, another part of the brain generates impulses to keep surfing online, accompanied by thoughts like, “Just one more article.”

Feelings hold a crucial place in Buddhist practice. The Buddha emphasized that “everything converges on feeling” due to their pivotal role in our experience. Often, it’s an unpleasant feeling driving our behavior, like the sensation in our gut while mindlessly web surfing. When we’re mindful, we can observe these feelings without acting on them, recognizing that they stem from a part of us that is suffering. We can then respond with compassion rather than reactivity, creating a pause to choose wiser actions.

For internet addiction, there’s always an unpleasant driving feeling, varying from boredom to anxiety. By training ourselves to turn toward and accept our discomfort with kindness and compassion, we pivot from automatic reactivity to mindful response. Personally, when I notice I’m engrossed in online reading, I mindfully attend to any unpleasant sensations, usually in my gut. Without mindfulness, I interpret these sensations as signals to escape perceived threats like loneliness or boredom, turning to the internet for distraction. However, with mindfulness, I realize these sensations are just bodily manifestations created by a brain trying to warn me. By observing them and offering kindness, like touching my belly and saying, “May you be well, may you be happy, may you be at peace,” I handle them better.

Social media and internet addiction stem from trying to escape emotional pain. Freedom from these urges comes when we turn our attention to our pain and embrace it with mindfulness and compassion. When we crave something, it’s as if an invisible cord connects us to it. By mindfully addressing the painful feelings behind our cravings, this cord gets severed.

When I become mindful of my painful feelings, I weaken my emotional ties to the internet and social media, making it easier to put down my phone or close my laptop and engage in healthier activities. This fourth tool emphasizes stopping the formation of unskillful urges by understanding the feelings driving them and responding more wholesomely. This approach helps liberate us from the compulsion to stay glued to social media.