Embrace Your Pain (The Social Media Sutra, Chapter 4)

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Embrace Your Pain (The Social Media Sutra, Chapter 4)

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Embrace Your Pain (The Social Media Sutra, Chapter 4)

I’ve written a series of six posts explaining how we can break free from our social media addiction using teachings from early Buddhist scriptures. These teachings come from the Vitakkasanthana Sutta, which outlines five strategies to overcome compelling urges. In this context, “Vitakkasanthana Sutta” means “The Discourse on Quieting Thinking,” but I’m calling it “the Social Media Sutra.”

Here, “thinking” isn’t just about our inner dialogue; it includes the emotional urges driving us to use social media or surf the internet. The first tool is to shift our focus to something more positive. The second is to recognize the drawbacks of our current habits. The third is to learn how to reduce temptation. Now, let’s explore the fourth tool.

The fourth strategy is about “stopping the formation of thoughts.” Imagine having the ability to switch off your thoughts or at least turn them down a bit. The discourse suggests that if none of the other methods work to quiet our unskillful thoughts and urges, we should focus on stopping these thoughts. This results in the mind becoming calm, settled, and absorbed in mindfulness.

To illustrate this, think of someone walking quickly who decides to slow down, eventually standing still, sitting, and finally lying down. This gradual slowing down mirrors how we become more aware of what drives our fast-paced thoughts and actions, allowing us to let go and rest.

When caught up in compulsive online activity, recognizing the underlying anxiety can help us address the root cause. This anxiety might manifest as an unpleasant sensation in the gut, driven by a part of the brain responding instinctively to perceived threats like boredom or missing out. By acknowledging this feeling with mindful self-compassion, we create a gap that allows for a kinder, wiser reaction.

Feelings play a crucial role in this practice. The Buddha said “everything converges on feeling,” highlighting its importance in our experiences. By mindfully observing the feeling driving our behavior, we can choose not to react to it but instead respond with compassion.

For example, when I find myself glued to my computer, I notice an unpleasant feeling in my gut. Being mindful of this, I recognize it as just a sensation and don’t need to act on it. Offering kindness to this part of me, I might say, “May you be well. May you be happy. May you be at peace.”

Addressing social media addiction involves turning our attention to the emotional pain we’re trying to escape. By embracing this pain with mindfulness and compassion, we cut the emotional cord tethering us to our cravings. Consequently, our attachment to the internet and social media weakens, allowing us to engage in more wholesome activities.

This fourth strategy focuses on stopping the formation of unskillful urges by recognizing and compassionately responding to the feelings driving them. This approach helps free us from the compulsive need to engage with social media.

If you’re interested in the final part of “The Social Media Sutra,” stay tuned for Part 5.