We live in a time where it’s common to have intense admiration for your chosen political leaders and strong disdain for the opposing ones. Many believe this extreme partisanship is worse now than it’s ever been, and I tend to agree. This polarized state isn’t healthy at all. We need to figure out ways to reverse this trend, starting with ourselves since we have the most control over our own actions and attitudes.
Over the past few years, I’ve personally harbored a lot of ill will toward Donald Trump. I’ve disliked him and at times even loathed him, viewing him as morally repellent. According to Buddhist ethics, disliking someone is neutral, but ill will and hatred cross a line. They involve wishing someone to suffer, taking pleasure in their discomfort, or even wanting to see them harmed. Often, ill will leads us to believe the worst about someone’s motivations and readily accept negative stories about them, even if those stories aren’t true.
I admit that I’ve experienced ill will toward Trump, taking pleasure in his misfortunes and even wishing him harm. From a Buddhist perspective, this is not acceptable. Such feelings are unskillful and cause suffering not just for others but for myself as well.
Some of you may support Trump and be upset to hear this, while others might dislike Trump even more than I do. My goal here is to share how I’ve learned to overcome my ill will. I’ve actually found a way to love Trump, even though I still believe he’s a morally terrible person who shouldn’t hold power. This emotional shift wasn’t hard; it just required a change in how I thought about my relationship with him. Maybe what I did can help you too.
So, what did I do? I started imagining Trump as my wayward older brother. Most families have a black sheep—someone who doesn’t follow the usual social norms, cheats, lies, or even breaks the law. Imagining Trump as my older brother softened my attitude. Now, even if I believe he deserves prison, I no longer feel glad about it. If he were my brother, I’d visit him in prison to see how he’s doing and to offer support, feeling compassion for his denial and delusion instead of anger.
This approach has worked for me. I feel much softer toward Trump now, my heart is more open, and reading the news is less distressing. I suffer less because of this change. Every time negative emotions toward Trump arise, I remind myself of this perspective and feel compassion instead of hatred.
This approach may have roots in the Buddhist teaching that all beings have, at some point, been our mother, father, brother, sister, son, or daughter in the endless cycle of samsara. While I don’t take this literally, I think its purpose is to promote an attitude shift like the one I’ve described.
To be clear, I don’t approve of many of Trump’s actions, which I find unethical or illegal. However, I no longer hold ill will toward him. You don’t need to hate your enemies to oppose them. You can still recognize right from wrong and want to prevent further harm without feeling hatred.
Hatred isn’t necessary, and we’re better off without it. I know I am. As the Dhammapada says, “In this world, hatred is never appeased by hatred. By non-hatred alone is hatred appeased. This is an eternal truth.”
I hope this perspective is as helpful for you as it has been for me. Shifting from hatred to compassion can be challenging but ultimately lessens our own suffering.