An elderly friend once told me, “Aging isn’t for the faint-hearted.” She was mainly referring to the physical challenges that come with getting older—like the aches, pains, and tasks that were once easy but have now become difficult. On top of that, we often criticize our appearance as we age, treating it as a sign of weakness rather than a natural part of life. Aging isn’t a flaw; it’s simply part of being human.
The Buddha spoke a lot about aging and described it as one of the aspects of suffering, or “dukkha.” He also mentioned how we become enamored with our youth, thinking we’re different from older people and forgetting that we’re all on the same journey. This enchantment with youth can make it tough to accept the reality of aging.
Today, I led a meditation in front of my bathroom mirror, and I’ll explain how you can do it too. You need to be somewhere with a mirror where you can see at least your face, but ideally, your entire upper body. My brightly lit bathroom was perfect for this. It’s important that the area is well-lit because dim light can confuse your visual perception, leading to strange illusions.
You can either sit or stand, whichever is more comfortable. Keep your eyes open and relaxed; don’t stare rigidly. Let your eyes explore your reflection gently. As you do this, notice the sensations of your breathing and perhaps even see the rise and fall of your breath in the mirror. Remember to look at yourself with kindness, as you would if you were looking at someone you care about.
We often judge our own appearance more harshly than we judge others. We focus on our blemishes, wrinkles, gray hairs, and sagging skin, and tend to criticize these aspects. In contrast, when we see these features in another person, we might find them beautiful and even lovable. Try to appreciate your own appearance with that same kind and unbiased perspective.
Take a moment to drop in some words of appreciation for yourself. When you see a wrinkle or a gray hair, say to yourself, “How beautiful that is! This is a sign of being human.” Repeat this a few times. Then tell yourself as a whole, “Aging is a natural part of life. May I meet aging with grace and dignity.” Repeat this several times as well.
Another helpful phrase is, “May I support myself with kindness as I age.” Repeat this to yourself and continue to regard your reflection with kind eyes, appreciating the signs of aging and other imperfections.
The following meditation style is “Sitting With Bodhi,” meaning you’re encouraged to continue for longer than the recording’s ten-minute duration. I suggest setting a timer for at least 15 minutes before you begin.
Keep practicing this way, being kind and accepting towards yourself, and allowing this meditation to bring you peace.
Thank you for reading. I find this meditation a bit challenging but ultimately soothing.
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