There are many reasons why we might avoid meditating. Maybe we don’t want to face certain feelings or we’ve developed a sense of failure around our meditation practice. We could worry that taking time for ourselves is selfish or fear that meditating might hinder our productivity. Change itself can be a daunting prospect.
Despite knowing the benefits of meditation—we see it in the news and feel happier when we practice—we often find excuses to skip it. Our busy lives become a convenient justification, and we just can’t find the motivation to sit down on that meditation cushion.
I used to think that understanding why I resisted meditation would help. However, it didn’t make much difference. What truly helped was not analyzing my resistance but embracing it. This approach is a core aspect of mindful self-compassion.
When you feel resistance to meditating, try to be mindful of the accompanying feelings. Notice where they are in your body, their shape, texture, and the thoughts they provoke. Simply observe these sensations and thoughts without judgment. Treat this resistance as an object of mindfulness. Resistance, often tied to conflict and fear, is a form of pain. Recognize this pain and treat it kindly, offering yourself soothing words: “It’s OK. You’re going to be OK. I’ll take good care of you.”
The moment you become mindful of your resistance, you are already meditating. Your resistance transforms from a barrier to an opportunity for mindfulness. Wherever you are, just close your eyes. Breathe in and out, staying present with the resistance. This is mindful breathing meditation.
Talk to the fearful part of yourself, saying things like: “Hi there. I accept you. I care about you and want you to be at ease. You can stay as long as you need and are welcome to meditate with me.” Continue this until you feel comfortable in your practice.
In this method, the specific reasons for your resistance aren’t crucial because engaging in rational arguments with your doubt can be counterproductive. Doubt knows how to undermine you, but it doesn’t know how to handle being acknowledged with kindness and mindfulness.
Instead of arguing, outsmart your resistance with awareness and compassion. If resistance persists daily, set a low goal for your meditation practice. Even five minutes is sufficient. What matters most is consistency, not duration. By meditating for just five minutes each day, you establish a regular routine, outwitting your resistance.
Remember, the only bad meditation is the one you don’t do. Don’t stress about the quality; just keep practicing.