Nurturing Yourself: Embracing Self-Compassion and Self-Care

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Nurturing Yourself: Embracing Self-Compassion and Self-Care

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Nurturing Yourself: Embracing Self-Compassion and Self-Care

It’s funny—I’ve known since I was 13 that January is named after the god Janus, who has two faces: one looking forward and one backward. Now, it strikes me how fitting that is. The New Year is naturally a time to reflect on what was good or not so good from the past year, and to look forward to what we might do or change in the coming year.

I often tell myself I’m not into New Year’s resolutions. This reluctance stems from youthful attempts that I quickly forgot. But I can’t help but look back at the year that’s just past and at the year that’s beginning, much like Janus.

Last year had its challenges. Three people I was close to, including my sister, died within nine days of each other. I seriously re-injured my back, straining my left sacroiliac joint to the point where I could barely walk for several days and was in pain for months. My elderly parents both contracted Covid, which was worrying, although they recovered. Additionally, many of Wildmind’s sponsors had to cancel their subscriptions, largely due to financial struggles in the UK, which has faced a dire post-Brexit economy.

However, last year also had its positives. I published a book, “A Year of Buddha’s Wisdom,” on my birthday. I managed to avoid contracting Covid and reignited a habit of walking daily towards the end of the year. My meditation practice remained steadfast, even though the pandemic significantly reduced my social life, to which I’ve adjusted.

In an unprecedented move, I spent the entire year writing on a single topic. I began a course called “Politics as a Spiritual Practice” on January 14th and sent the final email on December 29th. This was a unique opportunity to explore one topic in depth. Essentially, I wrote a book and hope to find a publisher for it this year.

Sometimes, the good and the bad are interconnected. Although I did a lot of writing, sitting for long periods adversely affected my body, leading to my back injury.

This brings me to the main point: I’m good at self-compassion but not very good at self-care. Self-compassion involves responding kindly and supportively to our suffering, offering ourselves comfort and reassurance during tough times. It’s a powerful practice, and I’m proficient at it—I even wrote a book on the subject.

On the other hand, self-care is about looking after our own needs to prevent suffering in the first place, focusing on long-term happiness and well-being. This includes eating healthily, sleeping enough, taking work breaks, and exercising and stretching regularly. While I excel at healthy eating and getting enough sleep, I’m not as diligent about taking breaks and have been terrible at exercising and stretching.

Some people are good at self-care but lack self-compassion. They might lead healthy lives but are emotionally self-critical. While I excel at self-compassion, I fall short on self-care. Ideally, we should be good at both.

My back injury was a stark reminder of the importance of self-care. I really don’t want to go through that ordeal again, so I visited a physical therapist who taught me stretches and exercises to strengthen my core and improve my body’s flexibility. These practices should keep my back in decent health. Once my chest infection clears, I plan to resume daily walking.

Based on lessons from reflecting on the past and looking ahead, I feel it’s appropriate to set a broad aim for the year: “Thriving Through Self-Care.” I want to thrive healthily and happily. I imagine myself later this year, full of energy and joy, and I plan to achieve that by practicing self-care.

General aims alone aren’t enough, so I’m setting specific goals: walking for at least 30 minutes a day on average and stretching for at least five minutes daily. If I miss a day of walking due to illness or bad weather, I’ll compensate on other days to maintain my average.

Accountability helps, so I’ll check in daily on Wildmind’s community website to update people on my progress.

Toward the end of last year, I started working a four-day week after learning about a study which found that businesses switching to a shorter week became more productive. I’ve been doing this for a month and it seems to be helping. I feel more creative and end my workweek with joy, not exhaustion, and feel more relaxed over weekends.

Despite focusing on teaching a year-long course on politics, I neglected to address a significant loss of income as supporters withdrew their sponsorships. This caused a lot of stress, so part of my self-care practice will involve rebuilding my subscriber base. It’s challenging to create when worried about financial stability. In the long-term, I’d like to hire someone to help with community growth and engagement, allowing me to dedicate 100% of my energy to teaching without financial concerns.

So, this is what I’m learning from last year and how I plan to live 2023 differently, based on those lessons. One more goal: I aim to write on this blog three times a month for the rest of the year, even if the reports are brief. Some posts will continue themes from this one.

I wish you a very Happy New Year. If you have thoughts on self-care, New Year’s aspirations, resolutions, or goals, feel free to share them in the comments below.