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In my new book, “Resilient,” I provide practical strategies for developing 12 inner strengths needed for maintaining well-being in a constantly changing world. Here’s an excerpt focusing on one of those strengths: Enjoying Life.
If enjoyment could be turned into a drug, we’d see TV ads for it every night. Simple pleasures—like petting a cat, quenching your thirst, or sharing a smile with a friend—reduce stress hormones, strengthen the immune system, and help you unwind when you’re frustrated or worried.
As you experience more enjoyment, your brain releases key neurochemicals like dopamine, norepinephrine, and natural opioids. Deep within the brain, circuits in the basal ganglia use dopamine to prioritize and chase rewarding activities. If you need more motivation for things like exercising, eating healthy, or tackling a tough work project, focusing on what you enjoy about these activities can naturally pull you towards them. Norepinephrine keeps you alert and engaged, making even a dull afternoon meeting more bearable if you find something enjoyable about it. Natural opioids, such as endorphins, help relax your body when stressed and lessen physical and emotional pain.
Dopamine and norepinephrine work together to mark experiences as “keepers,” making them lasting resources in your brain.
For instance, if you want to be more patient at home or work, actively look for chances to practice patience. Then, focus on the enjoyable aspects, like how good it feels to stay calm. Experiencing patience and savoring it helps turn it into a lasting trait in your brain.
Enjoying life is a powerful form of self-care. Consider what you enjoy. For me, it’s smelling coffee, chatting with my kids, and noticing a blade of grass pushing through a sidewalk. What’s on your list? Not the million-dollar moments, but the small everyday opportunities for enjoyment, even in tough times: perhaps feeling friendly with someone, relaxing when you exhale, or drifting off to sleep after a long day. Regardless of what’s happening around you, there’s always something enjoyable inside your own mind: maybe a private joke, an imagined scenario, or recognizing your own warm heart.
These small pleasures teach us a big lesson. It’s often the little things accumulated over time that make the biggest difference. In Tibet, they say: If you take care of the minutes, the years will take care of themselves.
So, what’s the most important minute in life? I believe it’s the next one. We can’t change the past and have limited control over the future. But each upcoming minute is packed with potential.
Are there moments you can use to support yourself, show kindness to your pain, accept yourself, and enjoy what you can? Is there something you could heal or learn?
Minute by minute, step by step, strength by strength, you can continually grow the good inside yourself. This benefits not only you but others as well.