Different kinds of distracted thinking can emerge during meditation. There are those obvious and overwhelming thoughts that completely draw us in, making us forget we’re meditating as we get lost in our inner dramas. We continuously drift in and out of these thoughts, returning to our practice whenever we regain mindfulness.
Then, there are lighter, background thoughts that chatter away as we stay focused on our meditative practice. For instance, while following our breath, random thoughts might pop up, either commenting on our experience or being completely unrelated. These thoughts usually aren’t emotionally gripping enough to distract us fully.
Let’s focus on this second type of thinking and how to handle it. Think about your inner chatter like listening to a toddler talk to themselves while playing. When a child does this, it’s often amusing and endearing, not something that frustrates us.
Our attitude towards these thoughts often causes more trouble than the thoughts themselves. When we resist our thoughts, wishing they would stop, we create a painful state of mind that leads to more distraction. This resistance throws us off balance, making us more mindful of our task and leading us back into distraction.
Instead, allowing these babbling thoughts to be present can prevent such frustration. Viewing these random thoughts tolerantly and playfully, like the sounds of a child playing, lets us continue with our meditation. The thoughts remain, but they no longer bother us. We can even find them amusing and endearing, making the meditation experience more enjoyable and effective than resisting them.
When our mind feels confined, our thoughts seem larger and harder to ignore, similar to being stuck on a long car ride with a constantly demanding child. To calm down this inner child, it’s essential to give it space. Once it has this space, it’s more likely to occupy itself quietly, allowing us to enjoy its babble while we focus on our meditation. Over time, the inner child might even take a nap, leaving us with a calm and spacious mind.
It takes time to get better at this, and good meditation instruction can help. Here’s a simple exercise to try: close your eyes, relax, and ask yourself, “I wonder what my next thought is going to be?” Keep watching and see if you can notice the thought once it arises.