In a series of six posts, I discuss how we can free ourselves from social media addiction using teachings from early Buddhist scriptures, specifically the Vitakkasanthana Sutta. This text outlines five strategies for overcoming intense thoughts and urges.
The Buddha advises working through these tools in a specific order. If redirecting the mind towards positive thoughts doesn’t work, then we consider the drawbacks of our addiction. If that fails, we use the next tool: “ignore and forget” whatever we’re obsessed with, which we’ll explore today.
The instruction for this tool is brief: if bad, unskillful thoughts related to desire, hate, and delusion arise, we should ignore and forget them.
Although this principle seems simplistic, it’s quite practical in reducing temptation. We’ll explore this in two areas: external activity and internal activity.
Firstly, consider how we can change our habits to ignore social media. For example, if you want to lose weight and potato chips are a problem, it’s easier to avoid them if you don’t see them. Similarly, we can manage our social media by moving apps off the main screen of our phone and turning off notifications, making it less convenient to access them.
Having your phone out of sight some of the time is beneficial. Don’t keep it by your bedside at night. Charge it in another room to avoid the temptation of checking it first thing in the morning. If you need an alarm, use a traditional alarm clock instead.
Turning off your phone overnight creates a delay in accessing it, leveraging our natural laziness to avoid instant gratification. Out of sight, out of mind.
Starting the day with meditation or reading a book instead of checking your phone can significantly improve your well-being. Reading books, especially paper ones, helps train the mind to focus and concentrate, unlike the constant distractions online.
Creating phone-free times, such as during meals with family or friends, can also help. Some even make a game out of it, like putting all phones in a pile and the first person to touch theirs pays for everyone’s meal.
Meditation retreats are great for disconnecting from the online world and experiencing happiness in present moments. Keeping your phone off or stored away helps in this.
On a deeper level, adjusting how we use our attention internally can also help manage addiction. There are two ways we pay attention with our eyes: a focused “flashlight” mode and a relaxed “lamp” mode. The latter, where we relax our eye muscles and take in the whole visual field, can be very calming. This mode of seeing can prevent us from becoming engrossed in distracting thoughts.
In meditation, using a soft gaze can make it easier to stay present with bodily sensations. This broad, open awareness helps thoughts pass through the mind without catching our attention.
This approach helps when we feel the urge to check social media. By maintaining a soft gaze, it becomes easier to let these urges rise and fall without giving in. This method, known as “urge surfing,” acknowledges that urges build and then dissipate on their own.
So, while “ignoring and forgetting” thoughts and urges might sound simplistic, it is a profound technique. By creating sensory environments free from our usual temptations and changing how we focus our attention, we can begin to break free from our addictive behaviors and patterns.