I’ve written a series of six posts describing how early Buddhist teachings can help free us from social media addiction. The Vitakkasanthana Sutta outlines five strategies to overcome compelling thoughts and urges.
First, it’s important to follow the Buddha’s advice to use these tools in a specific order. If redirecting the mind to positive thoughts doesn’t work, we should then consider the drawbacks of our addiction. If that still doesn’t work, the next step is to simply “ignore and forget” whatever we’re obsessed with. Today, we’ll explore this approach.
The Sutta briefly states that practitioners should ignore and forget about bad, unskillful thoughts connected with desire, hate, and delusion. While this advice may seem overly simplistic, it’s actually quite practical for reducing temptation.
We’ll consider this strategy in two areas: external activities and internal experiences. For external activities, we can change our habits to literally ignore and look away from social media. This means managing how and when we use our devices.
For instance, if you’re trying to lose weight and have a problem with potato chips, not seeing chips at home or avoiding the chip aisle in the supermarket can help. Similarly, our smartphones, which offer countless functionalities including social media, present a constant temptation. By moving social media apps off the main screen of your phone, turning off notification badges and sound alerts, and keeping your phone out of sight, you can reduce your urge to check it constantly.
Another effective method is to charge your phone away from your bedside at night, possibly in another room. This simple change can prevent social media from being the first thing you engage with in the morning. Instead, use an alarm clock to wake up, allowing you to start your day without immediately diving into online activity.
During phone-free times, such as family meals or social gatherings, you can mute your phone or leave it out of sight. Some people even pile phones at the center of a restaurant table, with the understanding that whoever touches their phone pays for everyone’s meal. Such practical changes demonstrate the principle of “out of sight, out of mind.”
This external strategy helps create moments free from online distractions, providing space to engage more fully with our immediate surroundings and relationships.
Internally, there’s another aspect we can focus on: the way we use our attention and eyes. Usually, we concentrate on a narrow focal point, like a screen or a specific part of someone’s face during a conversation. This focused attention can cause us to miss a lot and can contribute to our habit of getting lost in thoughts.
Another way to use our eyes is through a softer, more relaxed gaze that takes in the whole visual field. This broader awareness can help the body and mind relax, making it easier to let thoughts and urges pass without getting caught up in them.
In meditation, this approach parallels how we handle our internal focus. When we maintain a soft gaze, we create a more expansive field of attention where thoughts can come and go. This method helps us avoid getting hooked by distracting thoughts.
This technique is similar to “urge surfing,” which involves observing an urge as it builds, peaks, and fades rather than giving in to it. Using a soft gaze can help manage these urges.
Although the idea of ignoring and forgetting unskillful thoughts might seem simplistic, it’s quite profound. By creating addiction-free zones and adopting a relaxed, open field of attention, we can break free from patterns of addictive thought and behavior.