A Missive to Jacob

CalmMinds MeditationMeditation

A Missive to Jacob

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A Missive to Jacob

I get all kinds of emails. Most are friendly and appreciative, especially from people who find my writings or guided meditations helpful. I enjoy responding to their questions as best as I can. However, sometimes the messages are critical, like the one I received a few days ago from someone named Jacob, whose actual name I do not know. Since Jacob used a fake email address, I couldn’t reply directly, so here’s my response.

Jacob’s email questioned whether my supporters knew they were funding my living in a $400K condo and accused me of being unethical for not disclosing this. Jacob also found my former last name, Stephen, which I haven’t used since my ordination in 1993. This act, often called “deadnaming,” is like insisting on using a woman’s maiden name after she has married and changed it. It’s designed to offend but doesn’t particularly bother me.

Jacob claimed I live in an expensive condo. However, if he had looked more closely, he’d see the address he found is actually a rental apartment I share with my partner. Our rent is $1,765 monthly, including fees for our dogs and my children’s part-time stays. It’s not a luxurious place; our neighbors used to be meth addicts, who left behind a mess, but now we have a lovely young couple living downstairs. While it’s not the worst area, it’s not the best either, but we’re close to some woods where I like to walk my dogs.

Even if I did own a $400K condo, it wouldn’t imply wealth. In my area, a $400K home is below the median house price of $550K, which is why I rent. I don’t own any property, nor can I currently afford to buy one. I recently bought a five-year-old Prius C to replace my old car, for which I used up most of my savings. I have no pension plan and constantly juggle bills, often feeling anxious about money.

For most of my life, I’ve either been a student or worked full-time teaching meditation and Buddhism, which isn’t lucrative. I’ve worked in various roles, including running a retreat center and an urban Buddhist center, often just receiving food and board with a small stipend. Though it’s financially challenging, I deeply enjoy helping people become happier.

Jacob, it’s easy to jump to conclusions. If you had asked and given a real email, I would have been glad to share this information. Concerns about wealthy “gurus” are valid, but that’s not my reality. I hope this clarifies things and sets your mind at ease.

Teaching meditation often involves delicate financial balancing. The income that covers my rent and bills primarily comes from monthly contributions from supporters who value my teachings. These contributions, however, aren’t enough, so I supplement with other work. Ultimately, my hope is to one day not worry about money and perhaps even own a place with a yard for my dogs. If you or anyone else finds value in what I do, consider supporting me through Wildmind.

I hope you have a great day, Jacob, and to everyone else reading this far.

With love,
Bodhipaksa